FolioCorpusŚrīmad-Bhāgavatam

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam 3.22.11

तत्प्रतीच्छ द्विजाग्र्येमां श्रद्धयोपहृतां मया । सर्वात्मनानुरूपां ते गृहमेधिषु कर्मसु ॥ ११ ॥
tat pratīccha dvijāgryemāṁ
[tat prateechcha dvijaagryemaam]
śraddhayopahṛtāṁ mayā
[shraddhayopahritaam mayaa]
sarvātmanānurūpāṁ te
[sarvaatmanaanuroopaam te]
gṛhamedhiṣu karmasu
[grihamedhishu karmasu]
tat — therefore pratīccha — please accept dvija-agrya — O best of the brāhmaṇas imām — her śraddhayā — with faith upahṛtām — offered as a presentation mayā — by me sarva-ātmanā — in every way anurūpām — suitable te — for you gṛha-medhiṣu — in the household karmasu — duties.
Blended reading (Sanskrit + English inline)
tat pratīccha dvijāgryemāṁ
tat
therefore
pratīccha
please accept
dvija-agrya
O best of the brāhmaṇas
imām
her
śraddhayopahṛtāṁ mayā
śraddhayā
with faith
sarvātmanānurūpāṁ te
upahṛtām
offered as a presentation
gṛhamedhiṣu karmasu
mayā
by me
sarva-ātmanā
in every way
anurūpām
suitable
te
for you
gṛha-medhiṣu
in the household
karmasu
duties.
Therefore please accept her, O chief of the brāhmaṇas, for I offer her with faith and she is in every respect fit to be your wife and take charge of your household duties.

The words gṛhamedhiṣu karmasu mean “in household duties.” Another word is also used here: sarvātmanānurūpām. The purport is that a wife should not only be equal to her husband in age, character and qualities, but must be helpful to him in his household duties. The household duty of a man is not to satisfy his sense gratification, but to remain with a wife and children and at the same time attain advancement in spiritual life. One who does not do so is not a householder but a gṛhamedhī. Two words are used in Sanskrit literature; one is gṛhastha, and the other is gṛhamedhī. The difference between gṛhamedhī and gṛhastha is that gṛhastha is also an āśrama, or spiritual order, but if one simply satisfies his senses as a householder, then he is a gṛhamedhī. For a gṛhamedhī, to accept a wife means to satisfy the senses, but for a gṛhastha a qualified wife is an assistant in every respect for advancement in spiritual activities. It is the duty of the wife to take charge of household affairs and not to compete with the husband. A wife is meant to help, but she cannot help her husband unless he is completely equal to her in age, character and quality.

— A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda
Viśvanātha Cakravartī Ṭhākura Gauḍīya
Translation
Best of brāhmaṇas! Therefore accept her, suitable in every way for duties of houshold life, offered by me with faith.
The verse points at our hidden contracts — 'as long as this stays mine, I will be fine.' Detachment is the slow work of releasing those contracts before time forces it.
Reflection Questions
  • Where is family affection steering you away from spiritual inquiry?
  • What would loving your people while holding them loosely look like in practice?
📝 My note

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