Bhakti-rasāmṛta-sindhu .5.78
Blended reading (Sanskrit + English inline)
One old devotee said, “My dear Lord, when we are away from You we become so anxious to see You again, and there is great misery in our lives. But then when we do see You, there immediately comes the fear of separation. Under the circumstances, both when we see You and when we do not see You, we are subjected to different kinds of tribulation.” This is an instance of a contradictory mixture of ecstatic love for Kṛṣṇa.
By a joyful bhāva (śītaiḥ), the sorrowful rati becomes joyful. This means that the sorrowful rati becomes one with the joyful states. A sorrowful rati does not itself produce pain, since it does not have intrinsically any intense suffering. However, by the vyabhicāri-bhāvas such as viṣāda, it becomes intensely sorrowful, and thus appears (bhāsate) to give pain. The qualities of these bhāvas which arise because of separation from the Lord impose themselves on rati. It is similar to the medicine called yogarāja which takes on many qualities by having a combination of ingredients which have a variety of properties. This is an appearance only, because it is temporary with beginning and end. However, after the imposition of separation from the Lord, that interim period where one experiences the pain of separation appears to be permanent.
My note
Source: vedabase.io